A little tax humor with some tax jokes on TaxConnections Tax Blogs.

♦ Q: Who invented copper wire?
   A: Two tax attorneys fighting over a penny.

♦ “65% of people say that cheating on your income tax is worse than cheating on your spouse. The other 35% were women.” (Jay Leno)

♦ A certain tax lawyer was quite wealthy and had a summer house in the country, to which he retreated for several weeks of the year. Each summer, the lawyer would invite a different friend of his to spend a week or two up at this place, which happened to be in a backwoods section of Maine. On one particular occasion, he invited a Czech friend to stay Read More

♦ “Yesterday the IRS announced that obese Americans are entitled to certain tax breaks. Apparently, under the new rules, you’re allowed to claim two or more chins as dependents.” —Conan O’Brien

♦ There was a time when you saved up for your old age; now you save up for April 15th.

♦ A taxpayer received a strongly worded “second notice” that his taxes were overdue. Hastening to the collector’s office, he paid his bill, saying apologetically that he had overlooked the first notice.”Oh,” confided the collector with a smile, “we don’t send out first notices. We have found that the second notices are more effective.”

♦ The client went to the tax preparer and said, I filed my taxes electronically to speed Read More

♦ “People who complain about taxes can be divided into two classes: men and women.”  — Anonymous

♦ When your ship comes in, it’s always docked by the Government.

♦ Income tax is Uncle Sam’s version of “Truth or Consequences.”

♦ It’s hard to believe America was founded to avoid high taxation.

♦ Suggested simplified tax form: How much money did you make last year? Mail it in. — Stanton Delaplane

♦ “Worried about an IRS audit? Avoid what’s called a red flag. That’s something the IRS Read More

♦ An investor went to a tax expert and said: “If I give you $1,000, will you answer two questions?” The expert replied: “Certainly. And what is the other question?”

♦ Q: How do you humble a person that flaunts their wealth?
A: Have them fill out a tax return.

♦ America is the land of opportunity. Everybody can become a taxpayer.

♦ IRS MOTTO: “We’re not happy until you’re not happy!”

♦ Did you hear about the cannibal tax accountant? She charges an arm and a leg.

♦ A window sign in Chicago: “Tax Returns Prepared – Honest Mistakes Are Our Specialty.” Read More

♦ America is the land of opportunity. Everybody can become a taxpayer.

♦ It’s hard to believe America was founded to avoid high taxation.

♦ Golf is a lot like taxes. You drive hard to get to the green and then wind up in the hole.

♦ The fourth of July, 1776 – that’s when we declared our freedom from unfair British taxation. Then, in 1777, we started our own system of unfair taxation.

♦ When you do a good deed, get a receipt in case Heaven is like the IRS.

♦ The best things in life are free – plus tax, of course. Read More

♦ On my income tax Form 1040 it says “Check this box if you are blind.” I wanted to put a check mark about three inches away. — Tom Lehrer

♦ Suggested simplified tax form: How much money did you make last year? Mail it in. — Stanton Delaplane

♦ Jokes that tax accountants tell their children:
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9

♦ Dear Internal Revenue Service:

Enclosed you will find my 2013 tax return showing that I owe $3, 407.00 in taxes. Please Read More

♦ “65% of people say that cheating on your income tax is worse than cheating on your spouse. The other 35% were women.” (Jay Leno)

♦ When does a person decide to become a tax accountant?
When he realizes that he doesn’t have the charisma to become an undertaker.

♦ Why did the tax accountant cross the road?
To bore the people on the other side.

♦ What does a tax accountant use for birth control?
His personality. Read More