♦ A “slight tax increase” costs you about $300, while a “substantial tax cut” lowers your taxes by about $30.
♦ There’s a “tax cocktail” on the market – two drinks and you withhold nothing.
♦ The best things in life are still free, but the tax experts are working overtime on the problem.
♦ A doctor, a tax lawyer, a little boy, and a rabbi were out for a Sunday afternoon flight on a small private plane. Suddenly, the plane developed engine trouble. In spite of the best efforts of the pilot the plane started to go down. The pilot grabbed a parachute and then he yelled to the passengers that they had better bail out and jump. Unfortunately, there were only three parachutes remaining.
The doctor grabbed one parachute and said, “I am a doctor, I save lives so I must live.” The doctor then jumped out of the plane leaving two remaining parachutes for three people left on the plane. The tax lawyer grabbed a parachute and said, “I am the smartest man in the world and I save people money so I deserve to live!” He grabbed a parachute and jumped leaving one remaining parachute for little boy and the rabbi.
The rabbi looked at the little boy and said, “My son, I have lived a long and full life. You are young and have your whole life ahead of you. Take the last parachute and live in peace.” The little boy handed the parachute back to the rabbi and said, “Do not worry, rabbi! The smartest man in the world just took off with my backpack.”
♦ We wonder why they call them “tax returns” when so little of it does.
♦ Excessive taxation will carry reason and reflection to every man’s door, and particularly in the hour of election. — Thomas Jefferson to John Taylor
♦ “Ignore them and they’ll go away” is great advice for some of life’s annoyances. Unfortunately, it doesn’t apply to taxes. – Martha C. White
♦ The problem with practicing tax law is that the general rule never seems to apply to anything. – —-Anonymous Tax Lawyer
Next: The Unknown Tax Comic – Part 21