Each year during tax season I forward some of my favorite tax quotes and tax humor.
♦ “Nobody likes taxes, but they’ve been around forever. Taxes date all the way back to the year one, when baby Jesus was visited by two wise men and an IRS agent, who demanded half the family’s frankincense.” -Jimmy Kimmel
♦ “The U.S. Senate is considering a bill that would tax Botox. When Botox users heard this, they were horrified. Well, I think they were horrified. It’s difficult to tell.” –Craig Ferguson
♦ Why does Santa have an accountant in the USA? So he can avoid Gift Taxes.
♦ NASA astronomers, using the Hubble space telescope, have discovered a giant black hole in the United States with a tremendous sucking force that makes matter disappear. They have termed it the IRS.
♦ A man was floating along in a balloon and had lost his bearings. Finally he spots a man standing on a hilltop and shouted out: “Where am I.” The man on the hilltop responded: “You are in a balloon about 75 feet up.” The man in the balloon responded: “You must be a tax lawyer because what you told me is totally accurate and totally useless.” The tax lawyer on the hilltop responded: “You must be a tax accountant. You don’t know where you are or where you are going and now you are blaming the tax lawyer.”